


RAISING POTTER

by egare



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (From Both The Characters and The Author), Alternate Universe- Regulus Lives and Barty Isn't Batshit Crazy, Family, Gen, Harry Potter-Black in a way that no one would have guessed, Humor, Lack of Proper Baby Knowledge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2016-08-13
Packaged: 2018-08-08 12:56:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7758664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egare/pseuds/egare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>RAISING POTTER: A Guide to Raising the Boy-Who-Lived by Regulus Black and Bartemius Crouch, Jr., former Death Eaters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	RAISING POTTER

"Stop looking at me like that."

Regulus glared at the small child that had the audacity to laugh at him, and even turned his attention to his friend on his left, who was no different from the child. Barty was chuckling at the antics of the new father, his eyes on the Daily Prophet as he read about the Dark Lord's demise for the sixth day in a row.

"He doesn't understand you, Reg."

Yes, it had been six days since the Dark Lord was defeated by the very child that Regulus was glaring at. Six days since Bellatrix and company were arrested. Six days since the Potters died, and their son Harry was left an orphan. It had been six days since Sirius was arrested, leaving the Ministry no option but to shove Harry onto his brother. The second godfather was a werewolf, and the Boy Who Lived would _not_ be going to a halfbreed. No, going to a twenty year old Death Eater was a much safer option.

Granted, he didn't have the mark, nor did he actually agree with mass genocide and world domination by a halfblood, but really? Did they not bother with background checks anymore? Did they not just arrest his brother for being a Death Eater, days ago? Evil runs in the family, they should know that.

Regulus, along with little Harry James Potter-Black, moved to a small house in a muggle area of England; Barty was a daily visitor that also brought along dinner every now and again. Regulus was known to be a traitor to the Dark Lord, as he didn't kill Harry the moment he got him, and very few purebloods were happy that he was still alive.

He was thankful that the craziest ones were locked up and couldn't murder him, thanks to a small tip that Barty gave the aurors about Bellatrix and her friends targeting the Longbottoms. They were too late to save Alice, unfortunately, but Frank was still there to raise his son. He was also thankful that Narcissa was leading a small 'Don't Murder Regulus Black' club with quite a few Death Eater, and otherwise neutral pureblood, members, and although he didn't plan to show his face around them anytime soon, Regulus knew he could at least go to Hogsmeade without getting hexed to oblivion.

He was okay with hiding quietly, separating Harry from anything incredibly magical until he was older and could understand the story behind his fame. Regulus thought it was smart to slam the door on Dumbledore's face after he told the old man that Harry was going to grow up just fine, thank you, and that the Headmaster could bugger off.

Unfortunately, he had to be okay with the second appointed godfather visiting. The werewolf would come at least twice a week, much to Harry's pleasure and Regulus' opposite. He was just thankful that Barty always seemed to appear whenever Lupin visited, and was always happy to share stories about conversations that he had with his Pureblooded, dark arts loving friends. About how Alecto murdered a man that flirted with her, and how Narcissa threatened Barty when the latter tried to pick young Draco up without permission. Regulus had to give the werewolf credit- he didn't pale nor flinch at Barty's words. But the purebloods were both annoyed at and getting used to the werewolf's presence, every Tuesday and Thursday, exactly at eleven in the morning.

Months later, Barty became a Curse Breaker. Regulus considered that the moment when he officially won over Bartimeus Crouch Jr. from the dark side. He wasn't able to always interrupt Remus' meetings, now that he had a job, but he did move out of one of the Crouch houses and completely move into the muggle house that Black and Potter-Black were hiding in. And he helped with rent, so Regulus considered the job an overall plus. But there was a thought lurking in the back of Regulus Black's mind that dealt with Voldemort, even as everyone moved on, and Harry turned two.

The Horcruxes.

Regulus had no doubt that Voldemort created more than one. It would be foolish of him to wish that he had destroyed the only one there was, and it was equally foolish of him to believe that he could destroy all of them while simultaneously taking care of Harry and moving on with his life. But he didn't quite know who he could tell.

Remus, perhaps; he was out of a proper job right now, and Regulus could pay him for every Horcrux he brought back. Barty would be told after they got a Horcrux, being a curse breaker, just for safety. Regulus could start to butter up to Frank Longbottom, pass it off as play dates for Harry and Neville, and spend those hours or whole-days looking for Horcruxes. It wasn't a bad idea, it wasn't entirely filled with Light-Side do-gooders, and Regulus could probably convince the werewolf and the auror to not tell Dumbledore.

...But would it hurt? To tell Dumbledore, he meant. He was pondering that thought one late August night, ten months after the defeat of Voldemort. Harry was already asleep in his bed, Barty had a long shift tonight, and the full moon was tomorrow, taking Remus out of Regulus' hair. He was alone at the dining room table, stirring his coffee and staring out into the empty room. The idea of telling Dumbledore had tickled his brain before, but he wasn't really sure that he could trust the old man. For Merlin's sake, he tried to put Harry with _magic-hating_ Muggles! Blood related or not, they were not a family for Harry, and Regulus was thankful for the Ministry fucking up and giving the child to the Black heir.

Well, now that he thought about it, he had no doubt in his mind that Sirius was most likely heir again- he went to Azkaban for Voldemort, no doubt mother would accept him back if he explained that he was a spy for Voldemort. But at the same time, it didn't make sense! He hadn't seen Sirius at any meetings, and the older Black brother didn't seem to agree with any of the Death Eater ideas. It was either really good acting, or something had gone wrong.

Maybe that blond coward, Pettigrew, did something wrong? And Sirius went after him? That wouldn't work, though, Sirius was the secret keeper. Everyone knew that, he was the obvious choice...

The obvious choice, meaning no one else seemed like an obvious choice. Which meant they were hidden behind the loud Sirius Black, as the actual secret keeper.

Really, if someone gave more than a minute's thought to this, it made sense. He would just have to check.

The next morning brought Barty making breakfast for what seemed like eight, by the intense smell that travelled to Regulus' room. He wrapped a robe around himself and slipped into some slippers, before making his way down to the kitchen.

"Red!" Regulus smiled at Harry's greeting, but his eyes widened when he saw the child sitting by the stove, where Barty was making eggs.

"Bartimeus Crouch Jr., what do you think you're doing?" He went forward to Harry, helping him off the counter and glaring at Barty, who just rolled his eyes.

"He's two, Reg, I figure he can sit up properly and not fall into the sink." Barty turned around, letting the utensils cook the eggs themselves as he worked on getting some tea on the stove, glancing at Regulus. "You can't keep babying him. He wanted to see what I was doing, so I told him he could watch only if he stayed away from the hot plates."

"Bathroom did bad!"

A chuckle pulled Regulus out of his rant, and he turned to the dining room table, seeing Remus sitting there and nursing a cup of coffee. Harry had positioned himself next to the werewolf, three pillows under him making him clearly visible from over the table. Remus smirked at the nickname, chiding Harry softly as the curse breaker set food out on the table.

"It's Uncle Barty, Harry. Not bathroom."

"I don't know, Barty, you are always full of-"

"Regulus!" Barty interrupted the twenty one year old, and Regulus grinned before returning to his food and the newspaper.

"Anything interesting in the news?"

"Other than the fact that they're already preparing for the anniversary of You-Know-Who's-"

"-Voldemort's-" Remus interrupted, and Barty paused, not at all looking offended. Regulus narrowed his eyes and glanced between the two, wondering when they had gotten so civil. But his friend continued, finishing his sentence.

"-Voldemort's defeat, nothing, really. Surprisingly quiet."

_It wasn't going to last,_ he wanted to say. _Voldemort had Horcruxes, he wouldn't stay dead, he would find a way to revive himself and continue his plan to wipe out muggleborns and muggles, he would drag Regulus back into the dark._ But he couldn't say anything, couldn't find the proper way or the proper time to inform them, so he simply nodded, eating his breakfast without another word.

Regulus tried to ignore the confused look that Harry was giving him, as the Black brother stared into his plate, silent.


End file.
